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Sweathog Living: Ten-Minute Raccoon Butt Shelf

Ten-Minute Raccoon Butt Shelf

Feb 15, 09:33 PM

The encroachment of suburbia has an increasingly adverse effect on indigenous flora and fauna. Deer often become expensive hood ornaments, wayward foxes cause latte-sloshing evasive maneuvers and groundhogs eat tender rhododendron buds. These and other events can be stressful to denizens from both ends of the food chain when the crush of the exurbs reaches into their natural habitat, leading to behavior that strays from the normal power, grace and wildness characterized by the remaining agrarian cornucopia.

Sweathog Living dedicates today’s practical lifestyle column to the strategic placement of a comforting butt shelf for a raccoon who has climbed 15 feet up a tree and wedged its head in a squirrel hole. Suburban scion Carlos Alejandro shows his expertise in conservatively compassionate animal husbandry with this delightful display of cunning carpentry.

Tomorrow: Removal of the raccoon.

Brazo Fuerte

Abodes,

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